Quake Not, Want Not

It was Wellington’s turn to experience the skate board shuffle today.

Thousands of residents struggled to figure out where they’d left their legs, watched helplessly as workmates incurred dry cleaning bills and stared as dogs spontaneously took up ice-dancing.

Workers rushed home to be with their families whilst others sought safety and sanctuary in nearby churches, such as here at Our Lady of Mother Chickens : Fowl Church
Elsewhere in the region trains tip-toed, ferries fumbled and birds sought shelter:Owl in Tree
The 5.7 quake left us Christchurch residents feeling miffed as we haven’t had anything that big for many months.

The satirical publication The Civilian reported that in a bout of intercity rivalry Christchurch had levelled this at the Capital: “Step off our territory, Wellington, you already get all the wind and politicians and aimless semi-mobile beards. You don’t need anything else to get sympathy. Earthquakes are ours, not yours.” But Wellington mayor Celia Wade-Brown says that it is in fact Christchurch that has stolen Wellington’s earthquake crown. “Everyone knows that Wellington has always been considered a seismic death-trap just waiting to snap close,” she said. “Christchurch took that limelight away, and it’s only fair that we begin to take back what’s ours. And the Ellerslie Flower Show. We’d like that, too.”

The earthquake, centred in Cook Strait, caused no real damage to Quakeywood or its residents but did generate mass panic in newsrooms as reporters fought desperately for stories about items falling off shelves and the spooky rattling of filing cabinets.

Earthquakes occur throughout much of New Zealand and not even our largest city is immune. Back in March, Auckland suffered a stringent 3.9 jolt:CHC and AKL earthquake 

Edit: Following a rather unusual request, (see comments below) I’m including this reaction to the Auckland earthquake which you may not have seen:
JAFA Earthquake

This entry was posted in 2013. Bookmark the permalink.

4 Responses to Quake Not, Want Not

  1. SJA says:

    Gillie if you come and visit, I’ll buy you all the Jaffas you can eat! Alternatively, Auckland is full of them…


  2. jillian wratteng says:

    goodness Good luck Jonathan you know some special people. I just want to know where i can get some jaffas?

  3. SJA says:

    I am honoured by your attention Mr. President.

    I’ll try and find the image you refer to.

    Thanks again!

  4. Good Luck Jonathan (GCFR, BNER, GCON) President of Nigeria says:

    I’m still chuckling after I have been reading your writing. I hoped you were going to make reference to the Jafas rolling on to the streets of Auckland.

    However, I remain very fond of your wonderful country and the many good people who continue to reply positively to our requests for assistance with our banking problems.

    Do let me know if you require more oil.


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